Kym:
Yes, movie fans, we have another Roland Emmerich action movie, which can only mean one thing: the White House is going to at least partially explode.
Rob:
Man can't even walk past a National monument without making 'explosion sound effects' with his mouth. Come to think of it, this isn't even the first 'White House under attack' movie this season, is it?
- 2 generic dudes and Morgan Freeman, + 2 better actors and chick from Dark Knight
Kym:
While Olympus Has Fallen may have indeed come first, I think White House Down was a much better movie, mainly because of the standout performances from Channing Tatum and Jamie Fox.
How much you wanna bet that's now hanging in his house?
Rob:
The pair really do carry the movie. They have great chemistry as the 'everyman ex-soldier caught in the crossfire' and 'thinly veiled Obama clone'. Without their chemistry, the movie may have been a lot more stilted and bland. I'm really glad they went with this cast.
Pictured here, for some reason dressed as ABBA
Kym:
I also liked Joey King, who played the hero's daughter. Instead of just being a generic damsel in distress, she's a very smart and brave character, and she played it well.
Rob:
If she looks a little familiar, it's because she's been working her little tuckus off! She's been in eight major motion pictures in the last two years, and also a TV series!
Kym:
She's probably best known as the girl in the China Girl/girl in the wheelchair in Oz, the great and powerful.
Rob:
*Thinks back...and then sobs uncontrollably*
Kym:
Judging by her performance's effects on my husband, I'd say she's got a good career ahead of her...as long as she doesn't work herself into a coma first.
Mere seconds before passing out
Rob:
The movie's not perfect, admittedly. It's definitely more of a 'fun/silly' action movie, mainly because of how ludicrously easy it is for the bad guys to take over the White House. In fact, I'd say it's probably the worst defended White House in history!
Kym:
I agree that they take over pretty easily, and then the secret service/military take forever to do anything in response, but I think part of the reason is because the bad guys *SPOILER ALERT* have the head of security on their side, who can subtly manipulate everything behind the scenes.
James Woods? Playing a bad guy? Who could've known?!
Rob:
I can't seriously believe that the secret service would ignore standard emergency procedure just because the head of security says so. If the guy in charge of security can personally override everything on a whim, then the white house has worse security than celebrities do. In fact, I'm willing to bet that Jamie Foxx has better security in real life than the president he's portraying.
By the looks of his former bodyguard, I'd say that's a 'yes'
Rob:
Also, the terrorists just 'sneak in' bombs and weapons?! In boxes?! You can't tell me that security isn't fully aware of exactly what's inside their anus at that moment, let alone their boxes and bags!
Kym:
The evil head of security probably helped them get everything in. He'd be the one to know all the ins and outs in the place.
Rob:
That still suggest many things:
1. The White House can be easily breached with a little inside help, and security will just stand around befuddled through the whole thing (worse security than a celebrity's home or major bank)
2. There are plenty of rooms/spaces without cameras or motion detectors, including the areas that should be protected the most (worse security than a casino or airport)
3. The security system can be undone with a single hacker, and can't be reached from outside the building (worse than an average Wal-Mart)
Kym:
Sheesh, the hacker really did have an easy time of it. Maybe they should've gotten Mark Zuckerberg to help out.
I know someone who could probably use a presidential pardon.
Rob:
The other main problem is the blatant, often ridiculous similarities to Die Hard 1.
Kym:
Bruce Willis save the president in that one?
Rob:
No, but the movies were alike in more or less every other possible way. I won't bore you with the entire list...
Kym:
Praise the Lord.
Rob:
But let's just say that in both movies we have a white hero in a sleeveless t-shirt working with a black sidekick to stop terrorists, who include a silly hacker and a big foreign guy who's angry because the hero killed his friend. Said villains are disguising their evil plot with fake demands, which the cops outside believe, leading them to try and get in through the roof....
Kym:
This is the short version?
Rob:
...only the villains are ready with explosives, which the hero found out by listening in while hiding above an elevator. The hero tries to warn the police, who try anyway, and not only fail, but almost accidentally shoot the hero in the process. Then the bad guys shoot the cop's tank with a rocket launcher, and...
Kym:
Zzzzzzzzzz...
Rob:
Okay, let's just say the number of similarities are ridiculous. They even both had a scene where the hero and black sidekick have a heart to heart while the hero pulls broken glass from a wound.
"YIPPIE KAI YAY MOTHER F'ER!!!"
Kym:
Feel better now?
Rob:
Yes.
Kym:
Okay, I'm cutting you off at two lists/rants. This is getting ridiculous. Besides, I think it's just nitpicking. White House Down was a very fun action movie. How can you not love a movie where President Obama (or equivalent) fires a rocket launcher out of a moving car?
Rob:
You can't. You have to love it. It's science.
Does this pair look like they care about plot holes?
Kym:
It's a good old fashioned crowd pleasing action/disaster flick, maybe not as good as Emmerich's Independence Day, but definitely better than Day After Tomorrow or 2012, mainly because it embraces the silliness of the premise and just goes with it.
Rob:
That's true. Despite being one of his least plausible movies, it's still one of the most fun.
Kym:
Who would've known he'd make a movie less plausible than one where Will Smith punches an alien?
But MORE plausible than Day After Tomorrow's 'Ship in downtown Manhattan full of wolves'?
Rob:
White House down flows really well, and isn't bogged down by length and repetitive scenes like some of his other works. They really saved time by not shoe-horning in too much pathos, unnecessary romances, or John Cusack.
Kym:
You really have it out for that guy, don't you?
Rob:
You have no idea.
Pictured above: John Cusack, glancing at falling piano
Kym:
Although it has nothing directly to do with the movie, I do have to point out one thing that bugs me: how many times does Roland Emmerich have to blow up the White House?!
Just one more time, okay? I swear this is the last time!
Kym:
I know we touched briefly on this earlier, but you've really got to wonder how many watch lists Roland Emmerich is on. He's blown up National monuments in virtually every movie he's ever made!
Rob:
Kind of suspicious, really. He just seems a little too excited to blow up our Nation's capital. I think we might have to cut him off.
Great! Now build ten more sets just like it, and then drop the bombs!!!
Kym:
Mr. Emmerich...you have a problem.
Rob:
Yeah, nice movie, but maybe you should make your next film about something less 'White House exploding'. Like puppies, or something.
...
Kym:
Not that much to say about Monsters University, although that's not a bad thing. We expected a fun Pixar movie, and we got one.
Rob:
And a GORGEOUS one to boot! Every Pixar movie just seems to get better and better looking that the last! The fur of the monsters is downright eerie. They may have gone a bit overboard with the number of side characters though.
Kym:
I think it made the world seem more real, even if it's a little suspicious in a 'now we can make a toy of each one' sort of way.
Goth girls were Rob's favorite, especially Nancy Kim. Love the anklets!
Kym's favorite is the ridiculously strict and monstrous Librarian. Best scene in the movie!
Kym:
Of course, a large number of characters allows for celebrity cameos, like none other than Nathan Fillion as the head of the arrogant/bad fraternity Roar Omega Roar.
Space Cowboy, Superhero, Writer/Homicide Detective, and Monster Bully. The man has got RANGE.
Rob:
Despite being a prequel, and not the most mold breaking of stories, they made the premise seem less of a re-hash by focusing more on Mike than Sully. There's a lot of college in-humor, and Overall, it works well, and it's a very fun flick.
All the pranks/capers of a regular college movie, only without the sex/drugs/alcohol
Kym:
It's only real flaw is that it fails to reach the heights of the original, suffering the same problem as Cars 2. They do a good job exploring and expanding the world, and focus more on the sidekick's story, but they don't quite reach the quality of the first.
Rob:
Regardless, Monsters University is still a fun ride, worth it for the CGI alone! Once again, Pixar has blown me away.
Pictured Above: Rob's expression in the theater
...
FINAL RATINGS:
"White House Down "
Rob's rating: B
Kym's rating: buy on blu-ray, but you can wait until there's a sale
"Monsters University"
Rob's rating: B+
Kym's rating: buy on blu-ray, and pre-order at the Disney Store, to get the special coupon
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